Slavic Dawn

Little Englanders are much exercised by the possibility that the combined working populations of  Romania and Bulgaria, 29 million work-shy, benefits-scrounging immigrants, will descend on dear old Blighty in 2014. This is when the perfidious EU lifts restrictions on movement between the 25 member states.

The Coalition has hearkened unto its heartland (the Daily Mail) and produced an action plan – negative ads in Romania and Bulgaria emphasising the downsides of life in the UK. You would have thought that triple-dip recession, an economically illiterate government demonising immigrants and the poor, and swingeing cuts to social services, would do the trick. Romanians and Bulgarians must be desperate to come here.

But enough carping. As a patriotic Brit, I’m willing to do my bit in repelling the Eastern Hordes. To that end I made a poster for the ad campaign, and here it is:

Keep Out!

What do you think? I’m not 100% convinced about the caption, but the image scares the crap out of me, and I live here. Suggestions are welcome as long as I agree with them, and there might be a prize for the best one. No, really, there won’t be a prize, though the winners will get a mention. Shall we say a week?

Update: Just changed the caption to something I like a lot more.


I was talking to someone on the phone, and diddling about in Picasa with this image from Apocalypse Day at the same time. Not entirely sure what I did or in what order, but it looks quite Christmassy, don’t you think? In a kitschy kind of way.

A happy accident (or not, depending on your point of of view). The original image certainly had insufficient oomph.

Chucky Goes To Church

I bought this thing at a charity shop for 10p last year.  Can’t think what possessed me.  Part of it was amazement that anyone could produce an object like this of their own free will.  What were they thinking?  The other part is how filthy it is.  Looks like someone threw it into the corner of a basement and left it to marinate in the dirt and dust.

There’s something feral about the vertical mouth, presumably singing or chanting.  No chin, just a shallow depression below the nose, where the mouth takes centre stage.  And the eyes, framed by black brows!  As if trying to mesmerize its audience.

Most bizarre of all, the creature is dressed as a choirboy.  Possibly it’s clutching an oversized Bible, or maybe the Necronomicon, but the other hand seems to be holding a spout of some sort.  So it could also be a hip flask, or a jerry can full of petrol.

I can’t imagine anyone producing it by accident, through sheer ineptitude.  I think it’s saying:

Ia! Ia! Cthulhu fhtagn!